Catching Homesickness Near Home

Feeling homesick while I’m close to home may sound odd, but let me explain myself.

After the past 7 days – August 19 to August 25 – of being part of the Poetrypalooza 10 day tour, I started feeling home sick.

Yes, it’s sorta odd to catch homesickness on a tour that travels only within the Los Angeles’ city limits.

My homesickness, I suppose, may come from witnessing our entire city’s regional divisions and its people, all within a week’s time. This compressed amount of exposure of experiences within a short amount of time may have overwhelmed my sensual receptors to its highest peak – kinda of like the same feeling you get from drinking too much of something or eating too much without giving yourself a break in between sessions.

Poetrypalooza 2011 crew and talent at Eureka Cafe

Despite this small sudden urging feeling, I do actually enjoy the overall experience I get to have with the talents and crew of whom I get to travel, hang out, work, and have adventures with on the tour.

As I’ve gone through each day of the tour, I’ve learned more and more about myself and others around me. I’ve learned it’s important to keep things in perspective so not to get a big head about an idea or get too heated up on something when a particular thing doesn’t go as planned.

This tour has been an eye opener for me since everything I thought I knew or learned doesn’t really apply because it’s a new different kind of game in another field that requires a new approach. Fortunately, I’m able to pick things up quickly so I can see what I need to do, and run with it and have had no real problems.

As I’m writing this post, I think, as cheesy as it may sound, the influences that has helped me tremendously overcome my brief but sudden sharp homesickness came not only from the support and comfort of my friends, but also from this chicken wrap I bought from Armex, a local Mediterranean and Mexican style restaurant in my community. I don’t recall exactly the moment of how I felt better during my chowing down time on the wrap – other than being happy that I have food –  but I do recall my homesickness vanishing after I have savored and devoured every last taste and bite of the intense flavored wrap that has entered my mouth, tangled with my tongue, and eventually went smoothly down my throat and into my stomach.

Sharing my written works.

Looking back, my homesickness has helped me become more open with my audience in terms of developing my own courage to share my personal written works with them that I may not otherwise do. Because of this strong encouragement, I stop thinking about myself as an individual who’s outside looking in, but as a person who’s part of a larger group of people who’s looking in and around my surroundings. This experience, I strongly believe, is part of my developing process to stay connected with people as I’m growing as a person to understand the language and the meaning of being part of a larger group in humanity.

So to compare my homesickness to the larger context of my new re-established connection of humanity, my homesickness, in retrospect is only a tiny speck, barely visible on the map. And in retrospect, there are more positive energy I’ve emerged myself into with the days of the entire tour than with the negatives.

This little, tiny speck of emotion, now looking at it from the larger context, doesn’t really affect me as much as I thought it may have. Sure, it may have stung a little when it arrived, but now, it’s old news and it has dulled itself silently into the background as it is barely audible or even visible to me as I reflect on the feeling now.

Stay tuned for next Tuesday’s post: The essence of Chinatown.

For next week’s post, we shall take a trip with our ears into the busy streets of Los Angeles’ Chinatown. In the midst of all the traffic of people and cars, there is one particular thing that has denfinely caught my ears in the part of town that’s suppose to represent China. I hope you’ll come re-visit this blog, or for convenient sake, subscribe to it either through email or an RSS Reader so to see, or should I say, so to listen to next week’s post as we will reveal the story. And I promise you won’t hear me placing too much of myself into the focus in the next post.

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One thought on “Catching Homesickness Near Home”

  1. I miss Lincoln Heights and King Taco. I miss El Sereno and the old brown hills and bungalows. I miss Chinatown. Debs Park. The concrete slice of the L.A. River. Solano Canyon and Chavez Ravine. Each of these places holds the treasure of a thousand memories. You remind me that now I’m stuck far away in Long Beach.

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